Here's where I post life updates and reblog fun things!
@jraetimms on Twitter is where I share dumb thoughts and stalk comedians
@gl0ckenp0p on Instagram is essentially becoming a clothing diary
gifintcgs.tumblr.com is where I post gifs from The Chris Gethard Show as well as other posts about those involved. Sometimes I vaguely liveblog the show and for that I apologise.
I took this picture of myself at the end of a day I spent in bed, scared and crying, feeling alone and hopeless and completely desperate.
This is the face of my mental illness. This is the face of my sadness when it is at its most inexplicable and its most pronounced.
I am not ashamed of it.
— TJ Miller, Girl on Guy #145
CAN’T STOP LISTENING TO LOW FAT GETTING HIGH THESE DAYS
DON’T SEND HELP
- "Peoples’ Choice Award" is America’s greatest honor.
- Styrofoam is not made from kittens.
- The U.F.O. was a paper plate.
- The nerds on the internet are not geeks.
- The word “cheese” is not funny in and of itself.
- The older Flanders boy is Todd, not Rod.
- Lyndon Johnsons did not provide the voice of Yosemite Sam.
- If you are reading this you have no life.
- Roy Rogers was not buried inside his horse.
- The other U.F.O was an upside-down salad spinner.
- Our universities are not “Hotbeds” of anything.
- Mr. Dershowitz did not literally have four eyes.
- Our viewers are not pathetic food tubes.
- Audrey Hepburn never weighed 400 pounds.
- The “Cheers” gang is not a real gang.
- Salt water does not “chase the thirsties away”.
- Licking an electrical outlet will not turn you into a Mighty Morphin Power Ranger.
- Cats do not eventually turn into dogs.
- Bullets do not bounce off fat guys.
- Recycling does not deplete the ozone.
- Everything is 10% fruite juice.
- The flesh eating virus does not hide in ice cream.
- Janet Reno is evil.
- V8 fruit juice is 1/8 gasoline.
- Ted Koppel is a robot.
- Women aren’t from Venus and men aren’t from Mars.
- Fleiss does floss.
- Quayle is familiar with common bathroom procedures.
- Bart is bad to the bone.
- Godfry Jones’ wife is cheating on him.
- The Beetles haven’t reunited to enter kickboxing competitions.
- The “Bug” on your TV screen can see into your home.
- Everyone on TV is better than you.
- The people who are writing this have no life.
The Simpsons - Season 6 Episode 9 - Homer Badman
This is fast becoming my favourite Tumblr
cloacacarnage I JUST GOT BACK IT WAS AMAZING OMG ROMAN REIGNS THREW KANE INTO A STAIRCASE WHAT A HERO good times great classic hits
I do this a lot with my sister because Wayne’s World is one of “our movies”, but I recently automatically did it when Foxy Lady came on in a bar while I was with a guy that I didn’t know particularly well at the time and I am OH SO THANKFUL that he understood immediately and joined in.